I’m writing this as a part of the Japan Blog Matsuri’s March Edition topic – “Fast Times in Japan”. This month’s topic is about wild times in Japan or with Japanese friends that we haven’t spoken about. Well, I must admit, I’ve told this story before but I’ll tell it again because it’s probably what The Ghost Letters was looking for when he chose the topic.
I arrived in Japan in 2000 an English teacher at a conversation school in Urawa. I stayed there for a few months before landing a paying job at another school. It was a pretty decent gig and it was through this job that I got my work VISA and found an apartment. I had been teaching there for about a month or so and I was starting to get into a normal routine. My life in Japan was going great except for the noisy Karaoke bar next door to my apartment that I didn’t notice until the first night I slept there. I complained to my school after a while and they made arrangements for me to move into a new place down the road.
One evening after returning home and eating dinner there was a knock at the door. I wasn’t expecting any visitors and I hadn’t had time to make any friends around town so I was pretty confused as to who it could have been. I opened the door and standing in front of me were three men in suits with briefcases. There were two young guys and one old man who was missing a portion of his jaw due to, what looked like, a battle with mouth cancer. One of the young guys spoke English and he asked me my name – then he flashed a badge. He told me that they were Japanese Customs Agents and he asked if they could come in.
I let them in, they sat down and I made them green tea. The old man opened his briefcase and he pulled out a photo album with pictures of:
The young guy, who seemed to have come along for the trip because of his English speaking ability, asked me if I knew anyone by the name of Ivana Humpalot. I explained to him who that person was and he got a real kick out of the joke. The deformed faced old man didn’t find it the slightest bit amusing. He wiped his drool, yelled at the young guy in Japanese and they proceeded with the interrogation. They asked me if I knew anyone in Canada and I answered honestly that I had a couple friends in Vancouver. They asked me all types of questions about drugs, if I had requested a package, if I had received any other packages, if I bought, used or sold drugs…etc. I answered no to everything and I told them the truth – that I didn’t know who the person was that sent me the package.
They searched my entire apartment and spent hours sifting through all of my belongings. They tossed my entire place upside-down but they didn’t find any evidence linking me to the package. I was still living in the stone age at the time and I didn’t own a single computer or any type of hard drive. I only had my cell phone which, upon going through it, they found two phone numbers with the 604 / Vancouver area code. They did their homework and made the link – luckily I was honest about having some friends over there or else I would have been busted in a lie. That could have made me seem guilty but the truth was they had nothing to pin on me. I didn’t know who sent the package and for all I knew it could have been an enemy. That was my final answer.
When the agents were finished investigating they drafted a statement which was written in Japanese and they asked me to sign it. I told them that there was no way I would sign it unless I had someone who I trusted translate it for me. They allowed me to call one of my private students and she came over immediately to help. Thank goodness she translated it for me because there were a lot of things that I made them change. If I had signed the statement as it was originally written I might have landed myself in the pokey.
When the agents left I was relieved but still pretty paranoid about nearly violating Japan’s Cannabis Control Laws like this guy did just a few days ago. Ten minutes later my phone rang. It was one of the agents! He asked me if I wanted the stuff in the box besides the marijuana of course. I said “sure” but I was clear that I also didn’t need the icing since many peoples’ hands probably went through it. Two days later the box that I saw in the photos was delivered to me just as they promised. I think it came by Kuroneko Yamato but I’m not sure. They forgot to take out the icing per my request…and you would not believe what else they left in the box!
Was I being set up?
It just so happened that I moved the very next day into my new apartment down the road and away from the noisy karaoke bar. Surprisingly, I never heard from the customs agents again and needless to say…I was enjoying my freedom.
This is my entry into the March Japan Blog Matsuri!
Disclaimer:
This entry was written for entertainment purposes only. I have never used, bought, sold or or possessed illegal drugs of any kind in Japan or anywhere else in the world. I do not condone the use of illegal drugs. Arrests involving marijuana is not something to take lightly.
damn that is so wrong! Why would they go though all the trouble to set you up?
I can’t believe they sent it to you! Haha! Great entry to the matsuri. Did you ever work out who sent you the package originally? I’m not sure I’d call that person a friend, it’s taking a joke a bit too far.
I still don’t understand exactly what they were thinking or trying to accomplish. I sure was paranoid about it though.
I have a good idea who it was. I don’t think the person thought that it would be found so I can’t hold it against him/her. It’s the thought that counts :)
I’m amazed they managed to find it, and documenting the whole process with pictures is pretty scary. I wonder if they took pictures of you walking around *before* they found your little present form back home. That would really freaky…
anyway, good story!
Jamie – If I recall correctly they told me that they followed me for two weeks after finding the package to observe. Seeing surveillance photos of myself was definitely freaky.